The neighbor is watching

Here she goes, again. Is there a man? When Rob left her, I was relaxed. That drunkard vomited over my flower-bed every week. No wonder, the land is barren. Like Sheila. Many men and no children. The whole baby thing was such a turn-off for Sam and he ran straight into my arms. I hear he is locked up.

I like the boy who is mowing her yard. He was fixing her rocking chair, earlier. Lucky bitch! I am just an old, invalid woman whose kids never visit her.

“Hey, kid!”

He looks at Rosie Smith sitting on a wheelchair, in her patio.

She tightens her grip as he approaches.

“Sam,” she whispers.


Word Count: 110

Above in response to Voice week 2013 – voice 3


17 thoughts on “The neighbor is watching

  1. Hah, a bitter woman who watches to criticize. Sharp and sour.
    But what does she mean by “I hear, he is locked up.” Is he in prison? If that’s what she means, I think the comma is the problem (but you might want a second opinion. darn confusing commas…)

  2. Interesting, another storyline that might have gone differently had his parents known he existed. Sam might have stayed with Sheila, at least awhile longer, and maybe never dated Rosie, and – I’m really shooting in the dark now – never broken her heart to leave her quite so bitter. Her perspective is such a unique one – more involved and more affected than anyone would think.

  3. ah, the other woman. To be honest, I did find her as powerful as the others – the backstory didn’t flow quite as well – but I still think you captured her personalitiy and voice. Can’t wait to see the next one…

  4. I hate this woman already, she’s so bitter and a nosy busy-body no doubt…brilliant twist and exposure of the story, makes me wonder what actually happened with Sheila and Sam and why he is in prison; you have a beautiful gift with words. πŸ™‚

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