Rarely the sky of our mind is devoid of the cloudy doubts and raining anxiety. Rarely we walk without the nagging noise within. It buzzes and distracts us from the beauty of simple moments lying around. Rarely life stays still like a pond gazing at sunlight; thawing up to its profound and basic existence.
Everyday, I ponder and wonder over the sequence of events – from mundane to complicated. Rarely I find something concrete to rest the spine of my questions – every explanation seems incomplete, ever-changing and covered by flux of choices.
So, I have come to accept the envelope of chaos. I feel life is all but peace. There is an omnipresent movement and disturbance. People sometimes say – Why is there so much unrest in the world; why can’t everybody be nice? A list of why’s constitute the perfect habitat and we all strive to be something better, something else; something we perceive pleasant,fair and complete. I have found that to long for something imaginary as that only results in more noise. While one should try to be better, one cannot dislike the world because it is flawed and ever-changing. The universe seems to follow the law of balance – flaws exist so that there can be beauty; violence grows to finally die and be reborn as compassion and vice-versa. People suffer and vanish so that a new race can flourish – experiences cook in the pot of ever continuing cosmos to nurture evolution. Nothing begins and nothing ends but only transforms.
I believe we are silhouettes of existence. We are the carriers of the dark pigments that develop against the backdrop of divine light. We are the worries and we are the flashlights; we are the interconnecting threads and we are the nodes. We cannot expect evil to end just as we cannot expect goodness to last forever – we are their inseparable shadows – ones that dissolve in light and emerge from them. We are the source of flux and we are its sink.
The moment I realize this – everything moves away for a moment, pauses and begins, and then the noise resumes.